Director K Raghavendra Rao is planning to remake 1977 classic Daana Veera Sura Karna. The director is said to be wracking his head over the casting. Who will play which character? His casting agent was looking downcast when I ran into his at Rama Naidu studios in Hyderabad. I told him it wasn’t a difficult problem really. All the characters needed for the Mahabharat are in the Nandamuri family. So who plays what?
Kaliyuga Karna: Junior NTR
Junior NTR of course. Born out of wedlock, he is the tragic Karna in real life too. Not wanted by his brothers, he is tricked by his mother into sparing the lives of her legitimate sons in the great war. Just as Karna was tricked into somebody else’s war, Junior has been lured by Chandrababu Naidu into the present election campaign, making him the ideal choice for Kaliyuga Karna.
Sakuni Mama: The Fox
Who else but Chandrababu Naidu can play Sakuni. Just look at his credentials: the Viceroy conspiracy, the use-and-throw of Harikrishna, Daggubati and scores of others.
Duryodhana: Thunder Thighs Balakrishna
Raghavendra Rao’s ideal choice for Duryodhana is Balakrishna. Duryodhana slapped his left thigh to Draupadi and invited her to sit on it. Balakrishna has been on a thigh-slapping spree round the countryside even if there are no Draupadis around.
Dusshasana: Harikrishna
Harikrishna is Dusshasana. He is entirely a creature of impulse, with no great ability to think. He blindly follows the dictum of Sakuni and Duryodhana.
No one expects polls to be decent any more. But the water tap war between TDP’s Roja and the PRP’s Shobha Rani, ably assisted by Pavan Kalyan, would make even KCR blush. Vote 2009 promises to be the dirtiest campaign ever. We have already seen netas slapping their thighs, twirling their moustaches and questioning each other’s parentage. To what depth are we going to plunge this time?
“Kallu tagina kothi.” (drunken monkey)
Roja kicks off with a dig at Pavan Kalyan
“Roja has dirty behaviour and attire. She drinks and dances in the street.” Praja Rajyam’s Shobha Rani picks up the gauntlet
“You could write a book on Roja’s background. Everybody knows how she used to entertain film producers and their sons. She runs a bar at night and conducts a darbar by day.” Shobha Rani again
“Who is Shobha Rani? Let her know that Pavan Kalyan had affairs with several women. Don’t we know what background (Pavan’s wife) Renu Desai comes from?”
Roja comes back
“Chiranjeevi has illegal contacts with several artistes in the film industry.” Roja turns the gun on Chiranjeevi “Chandrasekhara Rao drinks till late in the night and wakes up around noon every day.”
That was Roja before the Grand Alliance
“Pavan Kalyan is a toddy tapper.”
Surprise, surprise! That’s B V Raghavulu
“Were you drunk and asleep when we were fighting for the common man? Where were you sleeping? With whom were you sleeping?” Raghavulu to Pavan Kalyan
"Harikrishna has neglected Shalini and has no moral right to ask for votes. TDP leaders point fingers at our leader and repeatedly speak about Pavan Kalyan’s divorce. Pavan divorced his wife and then married Renu Desai. So Harikrishna should declare the status of Junior NTR’s mother in their family.”
PRP’s Vasireddy Padma on Harikrishna
KCR's Gaali Dictionary
As for KCR himself, he’s been relatively quiet this time, but who can forget the contribution made by the TRS president to the dictionary of gaali politics? One of the reasons he has not been at his worst yet is that he is now friends with all his enemies. Since KCR has not come up with a decent epithet yet, we can only dig into the past. Here are some KCR nuggets from 2004:
Chandrababu Naidu is a gaja donga; his ministers are chillara dongalu. Chandrababu Naidu is the World Bank’s doo doo Basavanna. Chandrababu Naidu akalitho vunna jittulamari nakka. Chandrababu Naidu practises dabbu rajakeeyam and gabbu rajakeeyam. Chandrababu Naidu is a gunta nakka. Chandrababu Naiduvi anni sollu maatalu. Chandrababu’s is a chaprasi brathuku. Chandrababu harikathalu inka saagavu Chandrababu Naidu is a daddamma. Chandrababu Naidu is a kshudra rajakeeya tantrikudu. Chandrababu Naidu is a pick-pocket. His government is a pavala chupetti rupayi kottese prabhuthvam. Chandrababu Naidu runs a beeru-neeru government. Chandrababu Naidu is Andhra’s Harshad Mehta. Devender Goud is Andhra Ketan Parekh. Chandrababu Naidu is a pittaladora. Chandrababu Naidu is a pundakoru. Chandrababu Naidu has the most vikruta vyaktitvam. Chandrababu Naidu BJP moothi enduku naakuthunnadu? Sollu enduku thaaguthunnadu?
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